Mortality

I am reminded of the quote: "Dont take life too seriously, after all none of us gets out of here alive" (Unattrib).

At the risk of oversharing, I need to get something off my mind before I can get onto more frivolous things. Be warned, and proceed at your own risk.

Many people around the world will have seen the reports of KQ507 DLA-NBO crash in the early hours of Saturday 5 May. I think it hit most major networks. As I was on duty that weekend I was alerted early on Saturday morning in order to establish if any of our staff were on board. This was verified not to be so by mid-day and we stood down any direct involvement. At this stage the plane was still "missing" and a search was underway.
So much for the clinical part. I must say my emotions were all over the place. I have been on that flight myself (twice), and would have had no hesitation in getting on that plane that night, despite the thunderstorm. Last time I was on it was on my way to Zanzibar for a holiday with friends. Imagine. What a way to start your leave. So: very close to home in so many ways. I managed to send texts and phone some of my friends and family around the world to stop some of the worry.
As Saturday evening rolls around i meet some friends in our regular watering hole. They tell me of some other people who were on board. Several staff from Schlumberger, who I have met but cant say I know. My friend Tony is also rumoured to have been on board but I am able to eliminate this as I see his wife in the pub. Relief.
Worse, and shockingly, I learn that my friends Adam and his wife Sarah were on board. Sarah worked here for MTN and they were on their way to Johannesburg for a meeting. I know them well. They just got back from leave in the UK. We had been enjoying the Cricket world cup together. We were looking forward to the England-South Africa rugby tests at the end of the month and the Rugby World Cup in September. They have a daughter at boarding school in England. I am devastated. Shocked. I cant think straight.
At this stage its Saturday night, the plane is still missing and there is still "hope", although it has been gone now for a full day. The search is called off for the night as nobody can see anything anyway. I am mentally blown away. Possible survivors (Adam? Sarah?) spending a (second) night in the wreck in the jungle is doing in my mind.
At a birthday party for a colleague that evening there is just no way I can get in the mood. I depart as not to spoil it for others. Its a tough night for me and I have trouble sleeping, which is a very rare phenomenon.
Sunday morning and still no new news. The search parties are out. Friends of mine from CHC (A private helicopter and plane charter company) are up at dawn flying in the search grid along the presumed flight path. Nothing. Hope is fading fast that any possible survivors can be rescued after 2 days in the deep jungle. It is frustrating for everyone and fuses shorten.
Finally at the end of Sunday a local village hunter in the mangrove swamps just south of Douala reports finding the wreckage. The search focusses to rescue/recovery. 2o km south of the airport in dense tidal mangrove swamp there is a crater with aircraft and body bits.
The bad news is that nobody seems to have survived the impact.
The good news is that even if they had been found earlier, it wouldnt have made any difference. There is a sense of certainty. Yes they have been found. No they are not alive. I am torn between wanting to see the site and emotional repulsion and horror at the thought. My friend Stan overflies the site and reports feeling sick and upset at seeing it from his chopper. He has seen a LOT in his life. It must be bad. The Grieving process continues. My emotions are volatile and my brain seems to be broken. I walk up and down the stairs to my apartment 3 times forgetting car keys, wallet, to lock the door. I find myself trying to open my downstairs neighbor's door as I havent walked up enough flights. Very very weird. Slowly as the days go by a sense of normality is returning (As Jane would say "for a given value of normal").

I have received some great support from many friends all over the world. I am reminded of and thankful for each and every one of the people whom I care about. And I am reminded and humbled that people care about me. I feel mortal. Yes, a surprise to some, certainly to me.
Clearly I have alot of thinking to do, and strangely the Universe seems to be conspiring to present me with an opportunity to do so. Funny old universe really isnt it. More on that later I think.

TO post or not to post? That is indeed the question. Having written this I wonder if it is ready for the harsh electron glare of the Interweb. It certainly needs a health warning. Now added (yes at the front). I think I will sit on it for a while and see if it improves with another reading.
2 days on: No it hasnt improved but I have tinkered. I wonder if one can put too much of ones life online? I suspect so. This may be over the limit. If one puts parts of ones life online, and the server crashes, is that lost? Or vice versa, if one crashes, does one continue to exist online? Strangely New Scientist has an article on the afterlife today...

Koninginnedag 2007

Culturama.

For those of you that have been in Amsterdam on Koninginnedag (Queens Day= The NL monarch's birthday observance on 30 April), you will know that the central city effectively turns into one big party zone for the day and the police spend most of the afternoon fishing plastered foreigners out of the canals.

For this year a small group of us here in Douala

decided to mark the occasion by having a bit of a barbie. Fortified by a number of our Southern Neighbours (ie Belgians), one of whom kindly made his residence available.

We were introduced to the art and craft of "spijkeren". Take a log of wood about a meter long and stand it on end. Take some big nails and hammer one per participant just in, starting it so it doesnt fall over. Then one at a time have a whack on your nail. The object of the game: first one to hammer in his/her nail nominates what gets drunk the next round. Last one to hammer it in PAYS for said round :)

Whaddayareckon? We will be transferring the log to our favourite pub this weekend to continue this tradition. Photos will come in due course.

Meantime this is me enjoying Queens Day 2007 in Douala Cameroon. Cheers!